5 Practical Tips To Stop Should-ing Yourself

This blog post is made in partnership with Halo Top. All opinions herein are my own. Thank you for supporting the brands that make this blog possible!

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Over the past few weeks I’ve been exploring the idea of the “shoulds” – how to recognize them, work through them, and ultimately turn them into positive outcomes in our lives.

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In case you missed it – over on Instagram I talked about the mixed messages we receive as to who we should be, and a personal should I have been working through in my own life. I’ve loved engaging with all of you on this topic too, and I’m so thankful to be partnering with Halo Top to share the message of #StopShouldingYourself with my lovely HB community 🙂

As a woman and an influencer this is a conversation I want to always be having, but today I wanted to bring it all together with some *practical* ways we can take recognizing shoulds and reclaiming full freedom from them in our lives. So here are 5 practical tips to stop should-ing yourself.

5 Practical Tips To Stop Should-ing Yourself

1. Replace the word “should” with words like “can,” “will,” or “I get to”

This is a great starting point to shift your mindset away from shoulds. It might take a little while to click, but eventually your mind will come into alignment. Write it down, say it out loud, or close your eyes and repeat it in your head. Some examples:

Instead of “I should exercise x-amount of minutes today” say “I am so thankful I get to move my body and improve my health”

Instead of “I should cut carbs before going on vacation” say “I can choose to eat a bit healthier leading up to vacation, but I can also include foods that I enjoy and satisfy me”

Instead of “I should be more successful in my career by now” say “I will create tangible goals to reach the next step in my career, and I will enjoy the process”

2. Write down your intentions or whys each morning

If you’ve followed me for any length of time you know I’m a huge proponent of journaling. There’s just something about physically writing things down on paper that acts as such a great release, and can also turn thoughts into more of a reality. Each morning take some time – even if it’s just 5 minutes – and jot down your intentions for the day. This isn’t a to-do list – it’s more about how you want to feel, how you want to treat yourself and others, what you want to be more mindful of, etc. This helps because when those shoulds start to enter your mind, you can reflect back to what you already determined are your whys, and rely on those instead.

3. Filter what content you let into your life

Those mixed messages we get from the media and social media can be difficult to control, but it’s not impossible. Maybe it’s time you unfollow or mute certain accounts on Instagram. Maybe you should reconsider the podcasts you listen to, TV shows you watch, and even books you read. Our minds are like sponges – what thoughts are you letting enter in on a daily basis?

4. Have a support system

Sometimes overcoming a should can be as simple as one quick encouragement from someone you love and trust. It’s easy to let a should get into our heads and spiral into a million other shoulds (been there, done that), but the people closest to us can help give an outside perspective that is actually the reality of the situation. Call up your mom, best friend, or maybe even a friend you’ve made on Instagram and just be honest with them. Sometimes simply verbally sharing something can help you stop should-ing yourself.

5. Encourage others

You’ve probably heard “what goes around comes around” or “The Golden Rule,” and they’re not just feel-good ideas. I’m a big believer that helping others in need can actually be one of the greatest vehicles to receiving joy and freedom in your own life. Is there someone in your life that you can support or encourage? Making a habit of getting outside of ourselves can truly cultivate longterm positive emotions and thoughts.

I hope this post resonated with you and you found these tips encouraging! I’d love to know your feedback. Feel free to DM me on Instagram @hungry.blonde, or share on your Instagram Story with hashtag #StopShouldingYourself. xoxo GG